we have to be our own before we can be another’s

by Cloud @ lifeofcloud.net

These are just thoughts regurgitated out through my fingers onto a computer screen. Thoughts, thoughts, thoughts. Scattered, disorganized, vague, unassuming, general thoughts. Just thoughts. This is what you get.


There are thunderstorms right now. Thunderstorms! Spectacular thunderstorms! My projection into the sky! My emotions via the weather. Watch me, hear me, I’m beautiful! It is karaoke day across the street and they are interrupting my rumbling beauty.


I really am beginning to love myself. Years were spent thinking I was “okay”, then I progressed to happy with who I am. But now, now I simply love me. I love the kind of human being I am. I feel like I am a good person, an intelligent person, a loving and caring person, a creative person, a calm person, a worry-free person, a person who understands the importance of freedom and encourages it in her relationships with others…. You know, I think I’m quite the catch. Actually, I know I am. But I am not saying this with a pretentious and full-of-myself tone, there is humility in this, I swear it. But I think it is important that someone be able to recognize the good in themselves so that others may also recognize it in them. Confidence is key. Feeling self-assured and proud of who you are and what you have to offer in your relationship with others is important. I really think I’m one of a kind, and I love being the unique human being that I am. I’m proud of it (without being prideful).


People spend so much time worrying and obsessing with the past, with what once was, with what could-have-been, with what could be if things were different, with what they once had, with how things once were, that they will not realize how quickly they can lose what they have. And how even more tragic that loss will be, how much more remorse will fill them, how foolish they will feel…. You must step up, move on, and take some risks. It is foolish not to proceed with great change in your life because you are dwelling on great changes in your past. No matter how much time is spent concerned over what once was, it will never change things. I already wrote a post on the waste of time that is “worrying”. You are only hindering progress by becoming consumed by your past. Truly recognize the value of what stands in front of you and how quickly it can vanish if you don’t take action.


There are so many reasons in the world to just SMILE. Even if the weight of it all feels heavy at any point in time, it is hard not to be so grateful for SOMETHING that gets you to just break into a smile. Try and remember the things making you smile in your life, right now. What are you grateful for? For me: Generous and caring family, loving friends, my darling Luna, my condo, my neighbourhood, my career, CanMartyrs (“my” school), CanMartyrs staff… I could go on. You get the idea.


I should really keep my minor concerns to myself because it seems anyone I speak to about them add more fear to it all then remove any doubt. Negativity never helps a situation! I have learned to just keep quiet and let things roll.


That’s all for now!
Stay smiling, keep positive.

Much Love,
Claudia Amendola